The thing about autism is that the spectrum is so wide you never truly know what you will get. Luckily for you, there are a few things that you can remember if you have your eye on someone who is on the spectrum.
For some people, autism could mean not being able to make direct eye contact, hating physical affection, needing more time to process information or make decisions.
Autism isn’t even something that you can notice from a person by their physical appearance either.
Keep reading our guide for seven things that you must remember when dating someone with autism.
1. They Can Get Fixated on Things
One common characteristic that many people with autism have is that they can get fixated on certain subjects, things, or even people. These things can completely consume their brains where they feel like they need to learn as much knowledge as possible about the thing they’re fixated on.
Dating someone who can get fixated on something can be very interesting because you can have awesome and in-depth conversations about the subjects and topics that they’re fixated on. They will truly appreciate that you’re interested in the things that they’re currently fixated on.
Don’t let it seem that their fixations bother you because they can’t help it.
2. They Stick to Routines
Another common trait that people with autism have is that they like sticking to their routine. Many people with autism have developed a daily routine that they will follow. It may change based on the day of the week but they will make sure to get each task done.
When dating someone who likes to follow routines make sure that you do your best to help them stick to it. Try to mesh your routine into theirs and help them out!
Sitting down and figuring out the best ways to fit your schedules together and coming up with the perfect routine can help your partner out. Communication is truly key when dating someone with autism.
3. They Enjoy Quiet Time
Depending on the person, people with autism most likely would prefer a chill date at a quiet place. Of course, you can still do all of the standard dates but going out of your way to take your partner on a quiet and calm date will make them appreciate you so much.
Going to a quiet cafe and reading a book together or drinking coffee is a good date idea. You could also just take a walk together through a park and talk a little bit.
Calm and quiet dates are always a great idea because it shows that you don’t need to be constantly entertained by something bold and crazy.
4. Give Them Time to Process
Whether the decision is big or small, the decision-making process can be rather difficult for people with autism. The best way for two people to work this out is to make sure that there is enough time to make a decision.
Obviously, you will want enough time to decide on big things like moving in together or getting married. On the other hand, making small decisions like what to eat for dinner can be quite difficult for people with autism too.
Don’t get frustrated when your partner takes a little bit longer to process some information. Sometimes taking in this information can make them feel overloaded which isn’t fun for anyone.
5. Be Direct With Them
People with autism enjoy making jokes, understand sarcasm, and can even goof around with you but it will take a lot of practice as well as getting to know you more.
The best way to go about joking around with someone you’re first getting to know them is by being direct with them. Let them know when you’re just kidding or joking around after you say something funny.
It is more difficult for them to read your body language than it is for you to read theirs so try to make them feel comfortable when you’re joking or being sarcastic with them.
When it comes to meeting new people everyone is different. People on the spectrum want to figure each person out individually so being direct with them will help them get to know you faster.
6. Ask Them Questions
The best way to get to know your partner and clear up any questions you may have is by asking them directly. Communication is the best way for people to get to know each other.
Being open and direct in a relationship is a great way to start off right from the beginning. Being open is a great way to avoid any misunderstandings that could arise in the future.
In return, let them ask you any questions that they may have. This is a great way to let communication in your relationship flow so you can both feel comfortable with each other right from the start.
7. Surprises Verse Spontaneity
One thing you need to remember is that most people with autism do not like surprises but they’re occasionally okay with spontaneity. As we’ve already mentioned, they take time to process things and decisions so surprising them could be a huge mistake.
The planning process is huge for people with autism which is why complete surprises could really throw them off course.
On the other hand, being spontaneous with your partner is something that they may enjoy. Inviting them to hunt for ghosts one night or try a new food for dinner are great examples of spontaneity.
These are all things that just need a bit of decision making and planning. They can still be turned down but they’re very spontaneous and fun.
Remember This When Dating Someone With Autism
If you’re dating someone with autism, then there is just one thing that you should remember above everything else and this is you need to love them for exactly who they are. You will learn and adapt to their quirks over time and they will do the same for you.
If you’re someone with autism who is looking to date, then create a profile on our site today! You can start having meaningful conversations right away and meet other people who share common interests with you.